Hello everyone,
As a kid did you ever eat a whole bunch of sour candy and then your stomach felt really upset? There is a "fruit" here called Tamarind, I don't know if its really a fruit, but anyway - it makes a really really sour syrup that is made into these small balls which are coated in sugar. I just ate two of them and although the sour sweet tasted great going down, I now have a small regret eating them all.
This week has been a very stressful week. I think I do a very good job at focusing on the positive aspects of Guyana, but to be honest there are a ton of stressful things. My biggest stress currently is the dynamics at my work place. I work at a hospital where finances are extremely tight. In fact finances are so tight that we don't even have soap and paper towels in our bathrooms because that is an extra added expense.
I work in a department that has two social workers plus me. One of the social workers recently resigned and in the process of resignation there was a ton of office drama that showed the true colors of both the administration of the hospital and the department. I don't think its any different that another part of the world trying to cut costs and make money, but where is the mercy. I feel lost and confused at how to handle the stark reality that the world will always be flawed.
I wish and dream for justice for everyone who is involved in the situation but it will never happen because people are simply prideful and self absorbed. And I don't just mean this in this context but in general. You find wicked people all over the world, and yet whenever I see wickedness I lose my temper and want to fight. I don't often yell or get upset but when I see true injustice my blood pressure goes through the roof.
The world is in chaos because we love things and like people. I often pray that I truly learn to be prudent in all my decisions because I dread the idea of growing up to be a person who loves things and likes people. I pray that I grow up and don't lose the drive to have mercy and compassion.
Last weekend the homily at Church very much applies to my life here as a missionary and it follows:
31 “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’
44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’
45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
46 “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
The priest at Mass made a very good point about how when Jesus said this Jesus wasn't talking about Check Book Ministry. This is actually something that has been on my mind for a very long time. I was walking down the road one day and I saw a young boy who was wearing a shirt that said: "A family in Canada loves me". And I thought to myself - does that family really love him, or do they give a small amount of the extra money they have out so that you can have a shirt, and maybe some food. Now I want to say that giving money is EXTREMELY important and that without financial support I couldn't be doing the work I am. So please, always feel free to continue writing supportive checks, but in this Gospel it shows us that Jesus calls for so much more. Do we know people who we could help and yet turn them away.
So many times I see help in a bad way. For example there is an un-named organization that brings in donations to third world countries. The other day we got a whole shipment of G-string underwear. Seriously?! What you should call yourself G-strings for the poor?! I was so upset at the fact that people look at stuff and think: "Oh, I don't want this crap, so let me give this crap to someone who might also not be able to use this crap but it will make me feel better inside". Yes, old clothes are great and needed, but old underwear and socks is just degrading. Poor people have dignity. Sometimes that's all they have left and by treating them like dirt we treat Jesus like dirt.
For example when you give food to the food shelf do you go through your house and give out all of the stuff that you aren't going to use? Are you really thinking about your neighbor when you do that? I guess I get so passionate about this because I know the faces and the names of people who could benefit so much from the excess of other people, but often just get sent junk. I don't think when Jesus said to clothe, feed, and give water to our neighbors he wanted us to give crap.
When you are giving as Christ says when you help His people you help him. Would you change your donations if you thought of that every time you were about to help someone.
Where is our focus, are we giving out of excess and guilt, or are we giving out of our heart?
These are some of the things that are constantly running through my mind as I complete my job here. I don't mean to be directly accusing anyone or calling anyone out. Rather - just frustrated at the fact that us humans are completely flawed and wishing for a perfectly just world.
I know a young girl who is now HIV + because she was raped by someone close to her. I always find a lack of words to say but I've realized this week that I don't really need to say anything. Sometimes just always being there and being compassionate is the most you can do. Life really isn't fair, but we still have to make the best of it.
On a somewhat brighter side I have student named Jamal who has ADHD to the MAX. He can't sit still, listen, or pay attention for more than 10 seconds. I have been struggling with him all year to accomplish anything and each week I get a little more frustrated. Last week I had come to the end of my patience and I couldn't handle him anymore. Then I decided to change my approach. Instead of getting mad at Jamal and yelling at him every time he was ridiculous I decided I would put my hand on his shoulder and ask him what was going on. Or give him a small moment of encouragement. Finally this week during computer class I had a break through. I let Jamal work on my computer and I sat next to him and he actually worked for an entire half an hour. I was so relieved and happy. It made me frustrated at myself that I hadn't been more compassionate before. However, I am glad I finally had a break through.
I forgot it was THANKSGIVING this week. No holiday away from home actually seems like a holiday. We did have a small celebration with our friend Alex on Wednesday night since Sarah had to work on Thursday. It was nice but really I was just wishing that I was home. There is no place like home for the holidays.
Before I end I wanted to ask you all a favor. My cousin has recently adopted a small girl from China. Her name is Katie Grace and from the pictures I have seen she is just adorable!! She is having some medical problems with her lungs and heart and is in need of many prayers. Here is a link to her blog: http://www.adoptionoverseas.blogspot.com/
I beg you for prayers for this little girl. Please read her story and keep her in your thoughts. As my HIV patients always tell me - God can take me through anything.
Have a safe and happy week. Please pray for a safe and honest election here on Monday.
Love and prayers,
Ashley Ann
Whatsoever you do to the least of My people, that you do unto Me.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Elections!!
Hello,
Yesterday as I was at the hospital I ran into Sarah in the hallway and I asked her if it was her fault that the hospital was so much chaos and she turned to me and said "no, I was just coming to blame you". We both laughed and continued going about our massive amounts of work. Friday the hospital was absolutely packed there was not a single bed empty in Mercy Hospital. We also had a completely full day with patient after patient after patient. I think I finally ended up taking a twenty minute lunch around ohhh 2pm. I couldn't believe how there was just never a dull moment.
I enjoy the chaos of work sometimes because it keeps the day moving fast. After I finished work I had to go to the bus park to catch a bus to go home and I realized I was just going from one place of chaos to another. Yet - I use the word chaos in an endearing way, like as if the chaos because it is so constant really isn't chaos at all. Rather a well oiled machine that to someone who knows nothing about it looks like chaos, and it isn't until you fully understand the mechanics that you can understand and then begin to love the machine. I feel like that's a good way to describe the daily life in the heart of Georgetown. Yes it is crazy, madness, but beneath it all there is some system that works.
When I was at the bus park friday afternoon there was what I call a "Hobo circus". A few men who were apparently street dwellers had picked up some rope and metal rings. The proceeded to hang the rope between posts and try to walk across it, and then the did tricks jumping through the hoops. It was one of those things that you watch and laugh at and kind of makes every other thing that happened in your day seem not important. It was kind of a reminder that even though things are really tough there will always be something to make you smile.
Here is a picture of the market/bus park - although it really doesn't do it justice. This is just a very small part with not nearly as many people as normal. Plus it doesn't add in the factor of constant honking and shouting that is always present. :)
So anyway, At school this week my students started working on Microsoft PowerPoint and one of their assignments is to come up with a PowerPoint on any topic they choose. Many of them have decided to do it on themselves. One of my girls named Mohanie was writing about her best friend in her PowerPoint when she wrote: "And he is like a diary to me because I can leave all my secrets knowing that they are safe with him". I told her how much I liked what she wrote and asked her if I could share it. I felt like it was so insightful and well written and made me remember how much potential all my students have. We all have secrets that make us vulnerable to other people and she is describing such a beautiful relationship. A relationship of complete security. What a beautiful thing.
I said that I would put up some stuff about the upcoming elections on November 28th. I would first like to say I have no political views in Guyana and am simply putting up information that others might find interesting.
One of the major differences I have found is that there are Political signs EVERYWHERE. Maybe I forget what its like back home but there are major banners, billboards, and signs posted to every telephone and light post that you can see.
The party in office right now is the PPP/C the Peoples Progressive Party/Civic. If you click here you can see their facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/votepppc#!/votepppc?sk=info
If you would like to look at their official website it is here: http://www.ppp-civic.org/new/
The two people I circled are the Current president on the Left and the running president on the right.
The next party is the APNU - A PARTNERSHIP FOR NATIONAL UNITY
Link:
http://www.facebook.com/votepppc#!/pages/APNU-Guyana/195116613874257?sk=info
Their Offical Website:
This is the presidential candidate, David Granger, with some children.
The last major party that I see campaigning is the AFC. Alliance for Change.
http://www.facebook.com/votepppc#!/ChangeGuyana?sk=info
ALLIANCE FOR CHANGE
CHOOSE CHANGE IT'S TIME
AGENDA FOR CHANGE
We commit to -
... * Establishing a caring government where the suffering and the plight of the poor, the elderly in particular, youths, the issues of gender and Guyanese in general will be addressed in a timely manner.
* Creating a stable social and political environment where the rule of law is upheld to attract suitable local, regional and foreign direct investment for the creation of jobs, economic development, self reliance, wealth and the alleviation of poverty, consistent with the Millennium Development Goals.
* Dealing with the crime situation in the country in a holistic way and returning the country to a satisfactory level of security where our people could once again feel physically secure in their homes, places of work and recreation.
* Working towards the development of trust between government and the people, between local professionals and government; between the private sector and government; between investors and government; between all the ethnic groups in Guyana and government.
* Re-establishing a qualified and professionally competent public service and a National Insurance and Social Security Scheme that is relevant to the financial and economic realities of the Guyanese society.
* Restoring the principle of separation of powers, strengthening the three arms of the State by reforming the Parliamentary System, improving the standards of the judiciary as well as inculcating in government a culture of excellence and service to the people.
* Developing institutional arrangements for the mutually beneficial utilization of the expertise and financial means of the Diaspora.
* Conserving the natural heritage and the biodiversity of out country in accordance with the principles of sustainable development.
* Creating a system of education and moral guidance that will unlock the potential of our children in an environment of equal treatment and equal opportunity to give support to the family structure.
http://www.voteafc.com
Information taken off of their offical Facebook page - which is linked above.
I only have a few minutes before my time at the internet runs out - So I am cutting this a little bit short. But those are the three parties that are running for this election.
I hope you all have a very blessed week. Keep positive and enjoy the weather for me!! Take care of yourself.
All my love,
Ashley Ann
Yesterday as I was at the hospital I ran into Sarah in the hallway and I asked her if it was her fault that the hospital was so much chaos and she turned to me and said "no, I was just coming to blame you". We both laughed and continued going about our massive amounts of work. Friday the hospital was absolutely packed there was not a single bed empty in Mercy Hospital. We also had a completely full day with patient after patient after patient. I think I finally ended up taking a twenty minute lunch around ohhh 2pm. I couldn't believe how there was just never a dull moment.
I enjoy the chaos of work sometimes because it keeps the day moving fast. After I finished work I had to go to the bus park to catch a bus to go home and I realized I was just going from one place of chaos to another. Yet - I use the word chaos in an endearing way, like as if the chaos because it is so constant really isn't chaos at all. Rather a well oiled machine that to someone who knows nothing about it looks like chaos, and it isn't until you fully understand the mechanics that you can understand and then begin to love the machine. I feel like that's a good way to describe the daily life in the heart of Georgetown. Yes it is crazy, madness, but beneath it all there is some system that works.
When I was at the bus park friday afternoon there was what I call a "Hobo circus". A few men who were apparently street dwellers had picked up some rope and metal rings. The proceeded to hang the rope between posts and try to walk across it, and then the did tricks jumping through the hoops. It was one of those things that you watch and laugh at and kind of makes every other thing that happened in your day seem not important. It was kind of a reminder that even though things are really tough there will always be something to make you smile.
Here is a picture of the market/bus park - although it really doesn't do it justice. This is just a very small part with not nearly as many people as normal. Plus it doesn't add in the factor of constant honking and shouting that is always present. :)
So anyway, At school this week my students started working on Microsoft PowerPoint and one of their assignments is to come up with a PowerPoint on any topic they choose. Many of them have decided to do it on themselves. One of my girls named Mohanie was writing about her best friend in her PowerPoint when she wrote: "And he is like a diary to me because I can leave all my secrets knowing that they are safe with him". I told her how much I liked what she wrote and asked her if I could share it. I felt like it was so insightful and well written and made me remember how much potential all my students have. We all have secrets that make us vulnerable to other people and she is describing such a beautiful relationship. A relationship of complete security. What a beautiful thing.
I said that I would put up some stuff about the upcoming elections on November 28th. I would first like to say I have no political views in Guyana and am simply putting up information that others might find interesting.
One of the major differences I have found is that there are Political signs EVERYWHERE. Maybe I forget what its like back home but there are major banners, billboards, and signs posted to every telephone and light post that you can see.
The party in office right now is the PPP/C the Peoples Progressive Party/Civic. If you click here you can see their facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/votepppc#!/votepppc?sk=info
If you would like to look at their official website it is here: http://www.ppp-civic.org/new/
This picture of the party rally was taken on Regent Street - the "main street" of Georgetown. It was during a parade on nomination day. All of the parties had a parade before officially declaring their candidates. (This is if memory serves me correctly)
The next party is the APNU - A PARTNERSHIP FOR NATIONAL UNITY
Link:
http://www.facebook.com/votepppc#!/pages/APNU-Guyana/195116613874257?sk=info
APNU is not a political party, but an association of political parties, Guyanese organisations and citizens that share a common desire to ensure a bright future for our country and citizens, guided by our Statement of Principles. The name, “A PARTNERSHIP FOR NATIONAL UNITY”, (APNU), and our symbol were carefully selected after a prolonged period of collaboration, consultation and discussion with ...the wider Guyanese society. The First word “A” emphasises the moving away from multiple interests into a cohesive unit, hence: A Partnership for National Unity. The term “Partnership” was preferred over other suggestions such as “Alliance”, “Coalition”, etc., to convey the idea of sharing: shared power and governance; shared dividends; shared responsibilities. “National” refers to the homeland Guyana. “Unity” is the launching pad for everything and one does not have to spell out reconstruction, reconciliation, development, etc.; Unity gives the level playing field, as does partnership, thus the removal of all barriers to everything else. The Symbol, “The Palm of the Hands”, reflect the importance of all partners: their hands and their fingers working together. The symbols on the palm of one hand identify the initial partners from JOPP offering to the people of Guyana, represented by the map of Guyana in the other hand, an opportunity to work together in a Government of National Unity for the benefit of all our citizens. The two palms of the hand remind us all that the future/destiny of Guyana lies, literally, in the palm of our, (Guyanese), hands.See More | |
To demonstrate our commitment to national unity and to fulfil the requirements of the Election Laws of Guyana, the members of A PARTNERSHIP FOR NATIONAL UNITY will contest the 2011 General and Regional Elections as a single united List of Candidates with: a common symbol; a consensus Presidential Candidate, Mr. David Arthur Granger; a single Representative and a single Deputy Representative of the List of Candidates; an agreed Electoral Platform; and, a unified campaign organisation and management. (Copy and pasted from their facebook page) |
Their Offical Website:
The last major party that I see campaigning is the AFC. Alliance for Change.
http://www.facebook.com/votepppc#!/ChangeGuyana?sk=info
ALLIANCE FOR CHANGE
CHOOSE CHANGE IT'S TIME
AGENDA FOR CHANGE
We commit to -
... * Establishing a caring government where the suffering and the plight of the poor, the elderly in particular, youths, the issues of gender and Guyanese in general will be addressed in a timely manner.
* Creating a stable social and political environment where the rule of law is upheld to attract suitable local, regional and foreign direct investment for the creation of jobs, economic development, self reliance, wealth and the alleviation of poverty, consistent with the Millennium Development Goals.
* Dealing with the crime situation in the country in a holistic way and returning the country to a satisfactory level of security where our people could once again feel physically secure in their homes, places of work and recreation.
* Working towards the development of trust between government and the people, between local professionals and government; between the private sector and government; between investors and government; between all the ethnic groups in Guyana and government.
* Re-establishing a qualified and professionally competent public service and a National Insurance and Social Security Scheme that is relevant to the financial and economic realities of the Guyanese society.
* Restoring the principle of separation of powers, strengthening the three arms of the State by reforming the Parliamentary System, improving the standards of the judiciary as well as inculcating in government a culture of excellence and service to the people.
* Developing institutional arrangements for the mutually beneficial utilization of the expertise and financial means of the Diaspora.
* Conserving the natural heritage and the biodiversity of out country in accordance with the principles of sustainable development.
* Creating a system of education and moral guidance that will unlock the potential of our children in an environment of equal treatment and equal opportunity to give support to the family structure.
http://www.voteafc.com
Information taken off of their offical Facebook page - which is linked above.
I only have a few minutes before my time at the internet runs out - So I am cutting this a little bit short. But those are the three parties that are running for this election.
I hope you all have a very blessed week. Keep positive and enjoy the weather for me!! Take care of yourself.
All my love,
Ashley Ann
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Who am I?
Hey there,
Walking down to the internet cafe` today in the 90+ degree heat with a scorching sun made me think of all my friends and family back home who are enjoying the snow in their lives right now. I can honestly say I really don't miss the snow at all! I thought when I first came to Guyana that I would miss the cold, but I have converted and now I know that there is nothing all that special about being cold all the time!!!
This past weekend we had the flu bug go through out house and Meg, Sarah and Audrey got a little sick. Luckily I was able to stay healthy - mostly by avoiding the house. :) Meg got sick the most and had to miss a couple days of work. Monday gone was another national holiday. I ended up going into work to finish connecting all of the computers to the internet so it didn't seem like a holiday to me. This was okay since we had just had a holiday the week before.
I would like to throw a shout out to my beautiful and great friend Anna. She left Georgetown on friday to head back to the UK. Anna and I have shared so much throughout the past year together and reflected as I was helping her pack on how much we have both changed and grown in the past year. Anna was always a great person to talk with and throw ideas at. She is honest and passionate about life. Anna is never shy to make me see both sides of everything and help me to be cautious if I am about to tread in dangerous waters. I will truly miss her and she will always have a special place in my heart.
This past week we had to submit stories for our Mercy Volunteer Corps connection and my roommate Sarah submitted one titled: "Who am I?". We were sitting in her room talking one night and we were both reflecting on how sometimes we do or say things and we wonder what the younger version of us would say. I feel like I am a completely different person than I was a year ago. Conversations with Anna, Audrey and Sarah all helped me to confirm this.
One example of this is we were cooking in the kitchen and someone told Sarah what to do. I immediately stopped them because back in the day I used to over correct Sarah because I thought I was always right. Sarah said to me: "Ohh, just like Ashley back in the day, when you used to think you were always right... you're not like that at all anymore". I then replied: "Yeah, in fact I think sometimes now I admit when I'm wrong a little too easy". I am able to see things from so many different perspectives and actually to be honest if I have become judgmental against anyone these days its against people who remind me of the old me. Oh what growth can do to ya - its not always perfect and you always have something to work on.
I have been able to see this for a while but it really hit me this past week when I realized I just don't stress nearly as much as I used to. I used to let things bother me and stress me out and now although I do still have stress and troubles it reflects in a much different way in my life.
The main example I have for this is a huge change in friends throughout the past couple of months. Before coming to Guyana I thought that there were people in my life who I couldn't live without. Now I realize that this isn't true at all. People will always be coming in and out of our lives and I have finally come to the conclusion that at the end we just need to be at peace with ourselves. There are people who literally try and suck the fun out of life. Focusing on the negative doesn't get us anywhere. If you have a beautiful tree in your yard but it has a bunch of dead branches you should probably cut them off. Yes at one point the branches had beautiful growth but if it has become dead weight and is a negative influence to the rest of the tree - cutting it off is most often the best option. Life is about continual change and growth and once we become comfortable with the natural changes in life I feel our stress level will decrease dramatically. Yes there are times when we have to fight for things but not everything is a battle sometimes its just a turn in the road in which you shouldn't look back.
Audrey and Sarah have been instrumental in helping me to realize this. We have had many different people come in and out of our lives the past 14 months but they are two people who are constant. Last night Audrey and I sat in my mosquito night and has a really good talk about life and it reminded me that we are always provided with what we need. Sometimes we think we know what we want and what we need - but God is giving us a present 1000 times greater but because we are too stubborn to even look at the new gift we focus on the old.
I guess this week I am kind of at a loss of what to share. Life this week was busy with classes, patients, and catching up on some good sleep. The elections are coming up here and that has lead to some really big campaigns and interesting tatics. Next week in my blog I will share more about what is going on with the election and all the interesting things about that. I guess I will end with a short reflection that I had to do for our Mercy Volunteer Corps Connections:
"I once heard a quote that said "statistics are humans with the tears wiped away". I often wonder how many times I looked at a statistic about HIV and didn't think twice about it. HIV's toll on the world is easy to overlook when we only see numbers. My life in Guyana has forever made me look at these numbers not simply as numbers but as faces, as tears, as stories that are unheard by so many people.
I sometimes think we lose connection with actual human beings because of technology and Guyana has firmly reminded me to focus on the human rather than the machine. No story over text message or email is even comparable to sitting down with someone and chatting. Because we have this distant mean of information sharing and communication we have the ability to change horrible statistics into a fact that evades our heart.
Take time to focus on someone who has become a statistic, a story untold, someone the world has forgotten. We might not be able to change the world, but we can change a life. Give validation to a individual and connect ourselves to another human being. For every HIV statistic there is a tear and face, don't ever forget that."
Stay sweet,
Ashley Ann
Walking down to the internet cafe` today in the 90+ degree heat with a scorching sun made me think of all my friends and family back home who are enjoying the snow in their lives right now. I can honestly say I really don't miss the snow at all! I thought when I first came to Guyana that I would miss the cold, but I have converted and now I know that there is nothing all that special about being cold all the time!!!
This past weekend we had the flu bug go through out house and Meg, Sarah and Audrey got a little sick. Luckily I was able to stay healthy - mostly by avoiding the house. :) Meg got sick the most and had to miss a couple days of work. Monday gone was another national holiday. I ended up going into work to finish connecting all of the computers to the internet so it didn't seem like a holiday to me. This was okay since we had just had a holiday the week before.
I would like to throw a shout out to my beautiful and great friend Anna. She left Georgetown on friday to head back to the UK. Anna and I have shared so much throughout the past year together and reflected as I was helping her pack on how much we have both changed and grown in the past year. Anna was always a great person to talk with and throw ideas at. She is honest and passionate about life. Anna is never shy to make me see both sides of everything and help me to be cautious if I am about to tread in dangerous waters. I will truly miss her and she will always have a special place in my heart.
This past week we had to submit stories for our Mercy Volunteer Corps connection and my roommate Sarah submitted one titled: "Who am I?". We were sitting in her room talking one night and we were both reflecting on how sometimes we do or say things and we wonder what the younger version of us would say. I feel like I am a completely different person than I was a year ago. Conversations with Anna, Audrey and Sarah all helped me to confirm this.
One example of this is we were cooking in the kitchen and someone told Sarah what to do. I immediately stopped them because back in the day I used to over correct Sarah because I thought I was always right. Sarah said to me: "Ohh, just like Ashley back in the day, when you used to think you were always right... you're not like that at all anymore". I then replied: "Yeah, in fact I think sometimes now I admit when I'm wrong a little too easy". I am able to see things from so many different perspectives and actually to be honest if I have become judgmental against anyone these days its against people who remind me of the old me. Oh what growth can do to ya - its not always perfect and you always have something to work on.
I have been able to see this for a while but it really hit me this past week when I realized I just don't stress nearly as much as I used to. I used to let things bother me and stress me out and now although I do still have stress and troubles it reflects in a much different way in my life.
The main example I have for this is a huge change in friends throughout the past couple of months. Before coming to Guyana I thought that there were people in my life who I couldn't live without. Now I realize that this isn't true at all. People will always be coming in and out of our lives and I have finally come to the conclusion that at the end we just need to be at peace with ourselves. There are people who literally try and suck the fun out of life. Focusing on the negative doesn't get us anywhere. If you have a beautiful tree in your yard but it has a bunch of dead branches you should probably cut them off. Yes at one point the branches had beautiful growth but if it has become dead weight and is a negative influence to the rest of the tree - cutting it off is most often the best option. Life is about continual change and growth and once we become comfortable with the natural changes in life I feel our stress level will decrease dramatically. Yes there are times when we have to fight for things but not everything is a battle sometimes its just a turn in the road in which you shouldn't look back.
Audrey and Sarah have been instrumental in helping me to realize this. We have had many different people come in and out of our lives the past 14 months but they are two people who are constant. Last night Audrey and I sat in my mosquito night and has a really good talk about life and it reminded me that we are always provided with what we need. Sometimes we think we know what we want and what we need - but God is giving us a present 1000 times greater but because we are too stubborn to even look at the new gift we focus on the old.
I guess this week I am kind of at a loss of what to share. Life this week was busy with classes, patients, and catching up on some good sleep. The elections are coming up here and that has lead to some really big campaigns and interesting tatics. Next week in my blog I will share more about what is going on with the election and all the interesting things about that. I guess I will end with a short reflection that I had to do for our Mercy Volunteer Corps Connections:
"I once heard a quote that said "statistics are humans with the tears wiped away". I often wonder how many times I looked at a statistic about HIV and didn't think twice about it. HIV's toll on the world is easy to overlook when we only see numbers. My life in Guyana has forever made me look at these numbers not simply as numbers but as faces, as tears, as stories that are unheard by so many people.
I sometimes think we lose connection with actual human beings because of technology and Guyana has firmly reminded me to focus on the human rather than the machine. No story over text message or email is even comparable to sitting down with someone and chatting. Because we have this distant mean of information sharing and communication we have the ability to change horrible statistics into a fact that evades our heart.
Take time to focus on someone who has become a statistic, a story untold, someone the world has forgotten. We might not be able to change the world, but we can change a life. Give validation to a individual and connect ourselves to another human being. For every HIV statistic there is a tear and face, don't ever forget that."
Stay sweet,
Ashley Ann
Saturday, November 5, 2011
White Trash
Happy Belated Halloween!!!
I hope you all have had smooth transition into the month of November. In Guyana the date is written Day/Month/Year and I can tell you that November is always tricky writing /11/11 my dashes and ones get messed up, and well i've made a mess of some of the hospital paperwork already. haha : )
Last Monday we had a Halloween party for some of friends. It was just a laid back night where we all dressed up, had some cook up and channa, played games and some music. I've always liked coming up with creative/literal costumes for Halloween and this year I went as "white trash". I dressed up in a trash bag and made it into a shirt. I made a bunch of jewelery out of bottle caps and used aluminum foil. It was by far an interesting costume. There were people dressed up as zombies, Vybes Kartel, Sponge bob, Pirates, and anyone who didn't wear a costume had to put on one of our skirts over their clothes!! Three different men ended up wearing some pretty colorful skirts!! :)
There is a small cafe near our house and this week I ended up visiting it three times. On tuesday after work one of my friends showed up at my house and asked me what I was up to. I said nothing so they asked me if I wanted to go grab a coffee. We ended up chatting for quite some time and it made me thankful for the friendships that I have developed here. Sometimes just being with someone can make everything better even though no solution is created. Wednesday night I once again went with a friend where I ended up having a quite interesting debate about the topic of abortion. The individual brought the topic up out of no where and to be honest at the end of the conversation I felt like we had gotten no where. I firmly believe that if you are going to have a discussion on such a hot item - you need to listen to the other persons opinion. Sometimes I think we forget that just because we listen to someone else doesn't mean we need to believe what they tell us. My last trip to the coffee shop was with two girls and we just sat around and relaxed after both having a stressful day at work. Wandering conversations can be healing for the soul.
At work this week we had a small test in my class. I have always told my students how they don't need to be able to read or write well to do well on my tests - but they just need to pay attention and try hard. One of the classes in particular had test scores that shocked me. The students who are normally the most low preforming and have a very low reading level ended up getting some of the highest grades in my class. The students who have little problem reading and writing ended up getting scores WAY below satisfaction. It made me realize that sometimes when you think you are good at something you don't put the effort in. I was so proud of my few students who I knew had actually paid attention, asked questions, and really made the effort to do well. Never underestimate the ability of your students. They have taught me they all have great capabilities its just that they need the information presented to them so that they are able to grasp it.
The month of November is always a great month to take time to find things that we are thankful for. I guess the first set of Thanks this month that I would like to share is being thankful for having a purpose in my life right now. Even as I worked at the hospital this week I just felt good to be what I was doing. I am sure I could come up with a million little stories each week of why I love what I am doing. To have patients look forward to seeing you again or even just to make someone smile makes each day at work something to look forward to. Also of course my students. I had them help me do an ultra cleaning of my computer room this week and I didn't even have to try that hard to convince them. They may have done more talking than cleaning but I can tell they just enjoy being around and being able to have someone listen to them.
Well anyway, I have had a crazy busy week when it comes to work and socializing and even as I write this I have a few more things to get done.
Love and prayers,
Ashley
I hope you all have had smooth transition into the month of November. In Guyana the date is written Day/Month/Year and I can tell you that November is always tricky writing /11/11 my dashes and ones get messed up, and well i've made a mess of some of the hospital paperwork already. haha : )
Last Monday we had a Halloween party for some of friends. It was just a laid back night where we all dressed up, had some cook up and channa, played games and some music. I've always liked coming up with creative/literal costumes for Halloween and this year I went as "white trash". I dressed up in a trash bag and made it into a shirt. I made a bunch of jewelery out of bottle caps and used aluminum foil. It was by far an interesting costume. There were people dressed up as zombies, Vybes Kartel, Sponge bob, Pirates, and anyone who didn't wear a costume had to put on one of our skirts over their clothes!! Three different men ended up wearing some pretty colorful skirts!! :)
There is a small cafe near our house and this week I ended up visiting it three times. On tuesday after work one of my friends showed up at my house and asked me what I was up to. I said nothing so they asked me if I wanted to go grab a coffee. We ended up chatting for quite some time and it made me thankful for the friendships that I have developed here. Sometimes just being with someone can make everything better even though no solution is created. Wednesday night I once again went with a friend where I ended up having a quite interesting debate about the topic of abortion. The individual brought the topic up out of no where and to be honest at the end of the conversation I felt like we had gotten no where. I firmly believe that if you are going to have a discussion on such a hot item - you need to listen to the other persons opinion. Sometimes I think we forget that just because we listen to someone else doesn't mean we need to believe what they tell us. My last trip to the coffee shop was with two girls and we just sat around and relaxed after both having a stressful day at work. Wandering conversations can be healing for the soul.
At work this week we had a small test in my class. I have always told my students how they don't need to be able to read or write well to do well on my tests - but they just need to pay attention and try hard. One of the classes in particular had test scores that shocked me. The students who are normally the most low preforming and have a very low reading level ended up getting some of the highest grades in my class. The students who have little problem reading and writing ended up getting scores WAY below satisfaction. It made me realize that sometimes when you think you are good at something you don't put the effort in. I was so proud of my few students who I knew had actually paid attention, asked questions, and really made the effort to do well. Never underestimate the ability of your students. They have taught me they all have great capabilities its just that they need the information presented to them so that they are able to grasp it.
The month of November is always a great month to take time to find things that we are thankful for. I guess the first set of Thanks this month that I would like to share is being thankful for having a purpose in my life right now. Even as I worked at the hospital this week I just felt good to be what I was doing. I am sure I could come up with a million little stories each week of why I love what I am doing. To have patients look forward to seeing you again or even just to make someone smile makes each day at work something to look forward to. Also of course my students. I had them help me do an ultra cleaning of my computer room this week and I didn't even have to try that hard to convince them. They may have done more talking than cleaning but I can tell they just enjoy being around and being able to have someone listen to them.
Well anyway, I have had a crazy busy week when it comes to work and socializing and even as I write this I have a few more things to get done.
Love and prayers,
Ashley
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